One day, many thousands of years ago, when mankind still lived in caves and hunted and gathered their food, a man was walking through a thick forest.
He was wary and alert as you always had to be when you lived in these times. Danger was around every corner. Although, the man was almost hoping that something would eat him.
He had recently lost his family. His woman and his child has been brutally killed by a mountain lion. He had tried to save them but the lion had hit him with its massive paw and knocked him out.
As he lay helpless on the ground, unable to move, the lion had killed what he loved most in this world. He had been powerless to do anything about it as his body would not respond.
Blood had trickled over his face and blurred his vision but he could still make out the lion killing his loved ones. He had felt his heart break and was overcome with weakness and powerlessness.
He simply couldn't do anything as his body wouldn't respond. Finally, he managed to start moving again.
He had followed the trail but the lion had gone through a river and disappeared as if into thin air. The man had washed himself off in the stream but he still felt weak and dazed.
His brain tried to make up a story that they had just gone away to another place or perhaps they had never existed in the first place and it was all just a dream.
But he knew, deep down that they had existed and that he loved them with all his heart and now everything was broken.
Living in these times when death was ever present, it was still hard to deal with. He knew, that they would be reborn in the future and perhaps they will meet again in their next life.
But still, in this moment, he was distraught and lonely. He had lost his purpose and indeed failed in his purpose as well. That was, to protect and feed his loved ones.
They had been outcast from the tribe as often happened when there were disagreements. But they had been surviving by themselves.
He was a good hunter and his woman had many skills including finding berries for them to eat and safe shelters. But now, like a massive hammer blow of that lions paw, it was all gone and lost forever.
He experienced real depression for the first time in his life. He wished the lion had finished him off as well. Rather than leaving him to suffer with this new reality of his.
Now, as he walked through the forest, he was pondering what to do next. He was hungry but didn't have the energy to hunt. He just felt so weak and miserable.
But his survival instincts kicked in and he started to try and pull himself together. He knew, that despite his sorrow, he would have to fight for his survival.
It wasn't over until it was really over. He managed to kill a rabbit later in the day and built a small fire to cook it over.
He felt better after eating but still felt lost. He had lost his why. He had strong survival instincts but that didn't stop him not wanting to be alive.
The next morning he covered his fire place to leave no trace of his being there. There was some meat left over that he ate for his breakfast.
He wasn't really sure where he was going to go today but he started walking. He would start down by the river. He knew the lion was just being a lion but he still felt angry and wanted revenge.
Perhaps that would be his purpose. To hunt down that lion and kill it. He also knew that it was not only very dangerous but unlikely he could take on the lion by himself.
He wondered if going back to his village would be an option but he dismissed that idea as well.
Day after day, he wondered around, just walking and hunting when he had the opportunity. He was just existing but not living.
As time went on, he came across another tribe. As always, things started off a bit hostile but they realised he was just a man alone and he joined them as he posed no threat.
His life started to improve but he was still very sad. He would have waves of weakness wash over him. Where he felt totally helpless and powerless.
He lived in a dangerous world where death happed all the time but it was still hard to come to terms with. One of the woman in his new tribe took an interest in him.
They began talking more and more. They sat by the campfire at night and discussed what had happened in their lives so far. She was tender and kind and loving.
He felt something, like hope brewing up inside him. But then he would pull back. His past memory would come back into view.
That vision and feeling of lying helplessly on the ground while a lion killed his family. He knew, that if he stayed alone then he wouldn't have to face that pain again.
But his new friend reminded him that the past was over. It couldn't be changed. Now, it was up to him to create his future.
His family would be grateful that he survived and would want him to move on and be happy. To live a life they could not. But he kept resisting and she kept being kind and patient and understanding.
Finally, he realised that despite all his resistance and fears that he had grown to love this woman regardless. He knew it was too late to pull back from it.
He would simply have to be better than before. She taught him that despite how he felt, he was not actually powerless. He was not as useless as he felt at times.
He was not incapable. He had proved to his tribe that he was a good hunter and that he was strong and fit. He was useful to the tribe. And he was useful to her as a companion.
Their relationship blossomed slowly but surely. Their bond grew stronger day by day as did their love for one another. He strived to be better for her.
He saw that everything in life was just a lesson to improve and get better. He realised that all these thoughts and feelings he had, didn't serve him or help him so he let them go.
It wasn't quick or easy but over time, he put more focus on the now. He became more present and embraced this new love that he had found despite the anguish that had happened in the past.
His happiness and purpose returned and he felt renewed strength in him. He felt loved and he loved back in return. He saw the power in smiling and laughing.
He felt like he had been reborn and had been given a new chance at life and he embraced it. He still missed his family and felt sad at times but he didn't let it hold him back.
Life was short and he had to make the most of it in every movement.
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Oh, I love this!
Beautiful read